A few days ago I watched a movie called The Pianist. If you haven't seen it, stop reading this, come over and watch it. It's amazing. Not the kind of sappy/overdone/make you cry types of movies, but the one that makes your heart yearn to fix the world. It's set in WWII, and it's about a pianist who manages to survive the terrible Holocaust.
I'd seen it before, but this time it really made me think.
You see, I've got a great-great aunt that hid Jews during the war. She was one of those selfless people who was willing to give up her life for a complete stranger.
She is the type of role model I want to become.
I think that's why I feel so called into mission work. There's such a huge part of me that wants to say " Here I am. Send me!" and see where He takes me. To help people in need, to truly feel their pain and bring about some sort of relief that can only be fond through true faith in the only Comforter. Sometimes I feel so useless in the church I'm in. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE that church, and I truly believe in what I hear every Sunday, and I'm so thankful that I've been brought up in a Christian church! But I'm a 17 year old girl, looked down upon not only for my age, but for my gender as well. And to be honest, there's so little I can do in a church of believers. Yes, there are people in the church who do need help, but being the stubborn Dutch people they are are, people will rarely admit it, and certainly not to some teenager.
I think the most frustrating thing for me, is the lack of want to spread our faith. We want to horde it for ourselves, and not share it with those who might not be as well off as we are. Even the mention of doing mission work is so frowned upon among people I know. And that breaks my heart. Honestly and truly.
I understand ( and fully agree with!) that women can`t be preachers. But wanting to go overseas, or even in the streets of Calgary in order to tell other people about the good news is such a beautiful opportunity! Doesn`t God command us to go into all nations, spreading the good news to all the people?
So for right now, I'm praying hard, and reading God's word trying to figure out what it is He wants me to do. Going to University, getting something in Music or English and teaching is a dream that makes me very excited. But there's always, always, that little voice inside my head that says " What about mission work?" It's always been there, and I'm starting to think I need to listen to it more.
9 comments:
Courtney, I was writing a reply but I ran out of room. I'm going to put it on Facebook, okay?
Courtney Mae, just pray A LOT. I had no idea what I was doing when I was in grade twelve (okay, who are we kidding... I still don't) but I pray about it all the time, and it always feels like God is slowly bringing me closer to where I can serve Him better. Just pray that He will guide you and show you what you can do for Him. I don't think you have to give up your different loves--I don't think I have, or will have to, and I think most people would say the same.
Julie: Thanks! :) i'll read it there! :)
Heidi-Jo: Ya, I know that. and it wouldn't be giving up on one of my loves on account of I'd be pursuing something I loved, I just haven't figured out what that is yet! :)
and ps. I'm so glad you girls are smart ;)
One more thing. (Yes, I came back and read it again... =D)
I don't think we're looked down upon in our church for our gender. Our opinions are just as valued... look at YPS, for example.
Heidi, is that sarcasm? Because I can think of a few things in YPS that show that our opinions aren't as valued.
No, for once I actually wasn't being sarcastic. Like what things? Everybody knows who really keeps YPS together--us girls. You can't use you-know-who-who-I'm-not-going-to-say-on-the-internet as an example of YPS or our church.
See, that's what I mean. Everybody knows that us girls keep it together, but the reason that we have to keep it together is because we aren't allowed to lead it. Even though there won't be a competent leader. I just don't think that we really get enough credit for what we can and have done.
Yeah, fair enough.... I agree with you there. I do think we should be allowed to lead YPS when there isn't a competent leader (like, oh hey, now?) but it is what it is. Our church has its faults, as most churches do, but overall it's pretty fantastic.
You and I really need to talk about this (I'm very curious why you think women can't be preachers).
There is nothing but you stopping you from spreading the word of God, but remember-He's not going to throw you somewhere where you aren't ready for Him to put you there (if that makes sense). Keep listening to Him, and you'll get there.
I go through these restless periods when I feel like I can take on anything and wonder why He isn't sending me something to do. Believe me, you'll get something to do, and it'll take everything you are to handle it.
Post a Comment