Do you ever have those moments where you look at your life and think about what could have happened? For whatever reason, that's what I've been doing for the past few days.
There's a bunch of people I've known since I was really little. Some of them have lives that are slowly falling apart. They don't realize it right now, but it's something that anyone who sees them/ talks to them can easily pick up on.
These are people I grew up with. People I spent my childhood with. And it could just as easily have been me.It could've been my parents waiting up at night hoping and praying that I would come home. It could have been my friends who were replaced by drugs and alcohol. It could have been me constantly fighting to make my life work.
But it's not. God has been watching out for me. And to be honest, sometimes I wonder why. Why it's me who gets to have a beautiful home, and a family who loves me. Why I get to have amazing friends who I know would drop anything and run when I need them. Why my life's challenges are so simple and easy to get over, and when I look back on them, they're so insignificant. Why my family supports me even when I feel I've let them down. Why I felt strong enough in my faith to make profession of faith so young.
Those sorts of thoughts really humble me. Maybe there is a reason I'm so blessed. Maybe instead of all the selfish getting-me-ahead type of plans need to be re-considered. Maybe I should continue looking into some sort of mission work. Do something bold with my life and the gifts I do have.
I really don't know what I'm going to be doing with my life right now. That scares me like crazy. I've got some ideas that I know that would be 'smart'. But I've decided that I'm young, , and I'll make plenty of mistakes, but God knows what He's doing especially when I don't. And that's really the only thing that gets me through most days.
Anyways, those are my 'occasional thoughts' for today :) Out of 10, today gets about a 6. Not horrible, but it's got some room for improvement. Maybe I'll have some tea and do some English, that might push the rating up :)
3 comments:
Don't worry about the "why's", just be thankful for it. I know you already are :)
And you don't need to go into something like mission work to have an impact. You can have an impact as a mother, a teacher, a sanitation engineer... but really. Anything. God will use your talents in a way that works.
Oh trust me, I'm more than thankful :)
I mostly know that, but a part of me really wants to do something with mission work. I just haven't decided what yet :)
If everyone had lives that were falling apart, then there would be no one there to help them pick the pieces up.
Some of us need to fall apart to find who we are. Some of us don't. It's not a matter of luck, it's a matter of free will and individuality. You are blessed to be able to watch these lives and learn how to cope should something like this happen in your life-whether with you, a boyfriend/husband, children, or all three.
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